In this day and age everyone seems to stay in a rush. It’s hard to remember to do everything we need to do but to offer gratitude, just a simple ‘thank you’ shouldn’t be something we have to add to a list of things to-do. Sometimes, it is.
I’ve noticed this more and more. Maybe it’s because I’m online so much and I often see acts of kindness but nothing to indicate the person received a thank you. Then there are those who ask for something in particular and when they receive what they’ve asked for, they simply forget to say ‘thanks’. Is it because we’re so rushed as a society that one or two little words are now forgotten or is it because it is more or less ‘understood’ and unnecessary?
My daughter has a boyfriend and I see him a lot. He’s a super kid. He’s actually the reason I’m blogging on this topic this morning. He picks my daughter up for school and he always thanks me for breakfast or whatever I put in his hand, whether it’s juice or a bottle of water. Sometimes, he even thanks me twice for the little things—and maybe there’s the problem. After spending time with such a polite young man, I now notice how often gratitude is placed to the wayside.
A few months ago, I experienced a situation where someone asked several authors to cover for her in an online forum-situation because she wasn’t able to be there for a planned event. I went out of my way to help even though I really didn’t know the author or her work. In fact, I sent several emails out to my buddies to ask them to stop by and chitty-chat. Several others did as well. Later, one of the authors helping out there asked me if I received a ‘thank you’ for it. I told her ‘no’ but I didn’t expect one. I really didn’t. Her reply was this, “You should’ve gotten one—excluding all expectations.” Maybe she was right.
This brings me to another round of questions. Is gratitude anticipated at all these days? Is it over-rated? Is it implied and others take for granted that they are appreciated? Most of the time, I tend to be in the group where if I do something nice for you, I think you’ll appreciate me and we don’t have to pat each other on the back—turn about is fair play, kind of thing. However, I never want to miss my chance to say ‘thank you’ so if I miss it—bring it to my attention. Maybe I missed a post on a Yahoo loop or maybe you wrote an extraordinary review I didn’t see—tell me about it!
I realize in my particular business it is very difficult to say ‘thank you’ to everyone individually for purchasing my books or attending my chats. I realize writers may miss a post where someone says “great job” or “I loved your book” and in that instance, how can authors better relay appreciation? It’s food for thought, I think. I want to be appreciated whether it is implied or spoken, and I think it’s important my readers, friends and family know how much they’re genuinely treasured and appreciated as well.
My daughter’s boyfriend is one-of-a-kind. He reminds me of one of my brothers—polite and mannerly. He simply never forgets to say ‘thank you’ and it makes me more aware of the fact that it only takes a second to pass along appreciation. On the receiving end, it’s nice to be appreciated and even nicer when someone stops what they’re doing long enough to notice.
Until next time,
Coming to Whispers on August 29th! My most anticipated contemporary romance of the year!